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Childhood
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By dont drink alcohol, Section Ask B5
Posted on Tue May 18, 2004 at 05:02:40 AM PST
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About my childhood
When I thought of writing about my childhood, I recalled a coversation with my mother when I was in high school. I asked her the most unforgettable event which concerned me when I was little.
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My mother said, 'When there was a sports day (undoukai) in preschool, everyone was running together, working together and enjoying together, except for you. You were out of the group playing by yourself in the sandbox. You know, you haven't changed a bit since that time.'
I was not exactly expecting anything like what she had said. I had always reckoned myself as being part of the group or perhaps even center of a group. So my mother's saying that I'm not naturally a group loving person, was surprising and even a shock to me. Since I am a university student and have grown a little since high school, I have started to understand what she was trying to say.
I now don't like groups as much as I used to. It is not that I don't have friends or I don't like hanging around with friends but I just feel comfortable going to class alone.
My conclusion to this thinking of childhood is that that childhood represents the real you. The more you grow, the more you have a vision of what you want to be (in both positive and negative way) which can give you a mask and hide the really you. For me, being the center part of a group was the mask. So it turns out that what I had in mind about my childhood was pretty much different from the fact. But I had found my-real-self by flashing back. Asking your mother about when you were little can give you a flash back to the real you. You should try doing that!!!
PS I want to say to my close friends (especially GCH!!!!!!!!!!grilled chicken hamburger) is that this story doesn't mean I like being alone. I love being with people I love not as a group but as `individuals'.
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